136. The Truth about Being "Triggered"May 11, 2023
The word “triggered” comes up a lot when I am coaching and I think that understanding the truth about where it comes from will be so helpful for you.
Whatever it is your kid does or doesn't do, that is not what is triggering you. The trigger is coming from a thought you have about what they did or didn't do. If you want to see changes in the way you parent, then you have to figure out what you are thinking every time they do something that you think “triggers” you to act or react in a way that you don’t want to.
When your kid does the thing that triggers a thought for you, you have to figure out what you feel at that moment.
When we ask why is she doing that and we can’t answer it because we don’t know their motive, we don’t know what they’re thinking, we get triggered. The real answer is why is she doing that? Well, because she is. That’s why. When our brain can’t answer a question, it often leads to a feeling of frustration. Frustration is a gap between expectation and reality. The bigger the gap, the bigger the frustration.
You need to supervise your brain. You need to become aware of what you are thinking.
Learning to manage your mind and control your emotions along this journey is a game changer and will literally transform your life if you are willing to do the work.
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