120. Our Relationship with our Autistic Children

podcast Jan 19, 2023

In order for you to embrace your relationship with your autistic children, you have to first accept that it isn't going to look like or probably even resemble the relationship you have with your other child or children or the relationship you have with your own mother.  

The mother-child relationship is a unique bond that lays the foundation for a child's physical, emotional and social development and when you add in autism, it creates a layer of confusion for us as their parent.  Maybe your child is non-verbal or limited verbally or struggles to connect emotionally or physically or both.  

Many of us are just longing to have the more traditional closeness that we have with our other children or our own mother.  If you stay stuck in that place of wishing it were different, you will never accept and love it for what it is.    

What if you just accepted that it isn't going to look like any other relationship in your life?  What would that mean for you?  

Our children often think, speak and behave differently and because of that, we don't always know how to connect with them.  Guess, take a guess and try it.  

What I do want you to do is TRY something, then TRY something different and then one more time, TRY something again. This journey is full of changes and ups and downs.  Just because he doesn’t want to do it now, doesn’t mean that in 6 months or a year, he might not love it.

My relationship with Jordan looks NOTHING like my relationship with Maddie and honestly, it never has.

You have to do the work to believe that your child loves you because if you spend your time wondering or questioning, if you are asking yourself if she really loves you or how come he doesn’t ever tell me he loves me, your brain will always give you evidence of what you are asking.

I spent years asking myself those questions, the wrong questions, and when I finally realized that if I just changed the narrative I had with myself I felt so much better and it changed my life.  I stopped wondering, I stopped doubting and questioning because I decided on purpose what I was going to choose to believe. 

You can get there.  Be willing to do the work.  

If you want to get to know me a little better and learn how to reduce your stress and overwhelm be sure to register for our upcoming webinar.  

Click the link below for all the details:

https://www.notyouraverageautismmom.com/webinar

Additional Resources:

41. Emotional Ups and Downs of Raising a Child with Autism

60. The Most Important Relationship in your Autism Parenting Journey

If there is a specific topic that you would like us to talk about on the podcast, email us directly at [email protected]